Curated By Mollie Fermaglich
JUST WHEN YOU’D HOPED THEY’D GO AWAY FOREVER –THEY’RE BACK, WITH THEIR NEW ALBUM, FEATURING SOME OF THEIR GREATEST HITS!
IT’S THE SQUAD! THAT’S RIGHT – ILHAN, AOC, RASHIDA AND AYANA PRESSLEY, HAVE STOPPED BITCHING ABOUT HOW MUCH THEY HATE AMERICA, WHITE FOLKS, JEWS, CHRISTIANS, WHITE FOLKS, REPUBLICANS, MODERATE DEMOCRATS, WHITE FOLKS, CISGENDERED WHITE FOLKS, ISRAEL, ISRAELI CITIZENS, ISRAELI SALAD, TO PUT TOGETHER A VINYL GUARANTEED TO TOP THE CHARTS OF JIHAD BILLBOARD, AL-JAZEERA AND HAMAS HERALD-EXAMINER…
GET READY FOR…
THE NON-WHITE ALBUM!!!
Featuring the mellifluous, malevolent musical stylings of:
- Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
- Ilhan Omar
- Rashida Tlaib
- and that quieter one, Ayana Pressely
Featuring the Squad’s biggest hits:
- Something (That Some People Said)
- Marxists in the House!
- Squad-ee-dee, Squad-ee-dah
- With a Little Help from My (Socialist) Friends
- and more!
We’ve provided the lyrics so when you buy the album, you can relax in your favorite revolutionary outfit and sing along!
SOMETHING (THAT SOME PEOPLE DID)
(Omar/Tlaib)
Something that some people did
On 9/11 someplace downtown
Some little something that they did
I don’t even think it was
A real thing that happened because…
Some people I don’t know
They may have accidentally, um…
You’re asking me if it was bad
I don’t know, I don’t know
Don’t remember if I was sad,
I don’t know, don’t think so…
Something, I can’t tell you what
It seemed to happen sometime way back
I wish I could tell you what
I don’t know if it’s true
Think I’ll just blame a Jew
You’re asking me how could I dare
I don’t care, I don’t care
Unless it has to do with CAIR
I don’t care, I don’t care…
MARXISTS IN THE HOUSE (to the tune of Lucy in the Sky)
(A.O. Cortez)
Picture yourself in a condo in DC
With garbage disposal and no HOA
Somebody calls you, it’s only your driver
He’s yours and you don’t have to pay
Nancy Pelosi thinks she is the boss
Slamming that gavel so hard
Look for the girls with the socialist fists
Here we are
Marxists in the House, we scare you
Marxists in the House, we’re here now
Marxists in the House, you hate us
Ahhhh.
Follow us down to the Capitol Building
Where white privileged cisgendered people abound
Everyone cringes – we’re in the House Chamber
We’re young and we’re fly and we’re brown!
Nadler and Schiff guy appear on the floor
New evidence against Trump
We keep on trying to get him impeached
He’s still here
Marxists in the House, we’re angry
Marxists in the House with money
Marxists in the House, we own you
WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM (MY SOCIALIST) FRIENDS
(Tlaib. Got it, mother-fucker?)
What would you do if you came from Detroit
You were angry and you hated the Prez?
Would you go crazy in front of your kid
Join Pressley, Omar and Cortez?
Oh, I agree with my socialist friends
Hate Bibi with my socialist friends
Rule DC with my socialist friends
Would you believe that they listen to us?
When the truth is we’re not very bright.
The whole House of Reps is afraid of the Squad
You’re just scared because we aren’t white
Oh, gonna run with my socialist friends,
You’re not one of my socialist friends,
Pocahontas loves my socialist friends
“We’re gonna impeach that mother f*cker
Yes, I said it to my little son
He is so proud of his mom, Rashida
And so happy the coup has begun!
I get perks with my Socialist friends,
We wear burkas, my Socialist friends,
While we worka, my Socialist friends.
SQUAD-DEE-DEE, SQUAD DEE-DA
(To the tune of “Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da.” Tlaib & Omar & Cortez. And oh – that’s right – Pressley)
Rashida, AOC and Ilan Omar,
We’re just like the Beatles – George, Paul and John
Ayanna Pressley is our Ringo Starr
We love Bernie, she’s a Mohican
Squad-dee-dee, Squad dee-da
She loves Warren,
We love the Jew from Vermont!
We pretend that we are really Democrats
To make you think we always think of you
But we are Marxists who want to be your Autocrats
Like our shoes? Authentic Jimmy Choos.
Squad-dee-dee, Squad dee-da
We love free speech
As long as it’s coming from us!
Ayana Pressley thinks she’s one of us
She would like to play a bigger part
In the end she’s really just superfluous
Like we’re a dinner, she’s just a la carte
Squad-dee-dee, Squad dee-da
We are Marxists
Soy la revolucion!
FOUR OF US
(to the tune of “Two of Us.” Cortez & Omar)
Four of us, we’re together
Spending voters’
Hard-earned dough
Four of us, in the Congress
Won’t acquiesce
We’re the big deal now
We’re the big deal
Your Achilles’ Heel
Four of us living large now
We’re in charge now
In our DC homes
We have two homes
More than one home
We feel at home
That b*tch Jerry Nadler
Loves his gavel
Loves to bang it
He looks like a judge
Who dines on hot fudge
Adam Schiff has those big eyes
He thinks he looks wise
He just looks surprised
Just like Pelosi
She looks shocked too
They’ve both gone cuckoo
Four of us
We’re in Congress
Going nowhere
We have healthcare
We’ll be millionaires
Like Warren and Bern
Now it’s our turn
GET OUT! (to the tune of Get Back!)
(A.O.C + Ilhan Omar)
Castro was a man
Who overthrew a country
Che Guevera helped him, true
Got rid of Batista
And reclaimed Havana
Those guys could really throw a coup!
Get out!
Get out!
If you don’t like black berets
Get out!
So what if its natives
Cannot leave the country
And they drive old and shitty cars?
Fidel and Raul both drove huge Mercedes
And smoke those overpriced cigars
Get out!
Get out!
If you don’t smoke Gran Habanos
Get out!
Cubans in Miami don’t know what they’re missing
Who needs human rights? Not you
Freedom of expression, freedom of assembly
Time is saved when others think for you!
Used to be that Cubans could swim here for asylum
But Obama made a deal
Who knows if the Castros gave him an incentive
To return natives and throw them all in jail!
Stay there!
Stay there!
Havana’s such a lovely place to be
Stay there!
Stay there!
It’s over-rated to be living free!
A DAY IN THE LIFE (Same title, different lyrics)
We read the news today, oh boy
A thousand ICE pigs in New Mexico
A thousand more are on the way
Undocumented folks
These pigs just aren’t woke
Caucasians are the ones to blame
They all inherit homes and cars and junk
We don’t have anything at all
They stole it all from us
Everyone who’s white is who’s responsible for all that’s bad
We saw a bouncy house down there
Like ones they used to have in Buchenwald
The Holocaust wasn’t as bad
At least they had outfits
And everyone could stay, Gestapo didn’t force the people to go back home
Get woke!
And leave your tent
Here’s a home
We’ll pay your rent!
Get a driver’s license
Free food too
Moisturizer
And shampoo!
We think that they should all stay here
Undocumented people are the best!
We’ll give them green cards and healthcare
Taxpayers can pay all
Food, clothes, toys, homes, free Chick-Filet and MasterCards!
Maybe they can vote and we can help them register or not
Trump wants to build that wall today
He wants a border and that’s so not cool
We’re gonna fight him all the way
He thinks he owns the place
Wants to put a sign up that says “Trump” before “USA”
Ahhhh, ahhh, ahhhh, ahhhh, ahhhh
YESTERDAY
(AO Cortez)
Yesterday,
I told Jeff Bezos to just go away
Don’t care how much Amazon would pay
Take those jobs to Paraguay
Yesterday,
They made an offer without my say,
25,000 new jobs with real good pay
My constituents don’t have a say
Making money means they don’t depend on me
I can’t rule if they remain the bourgeoisie
Yesterday,
I was a bartender who mixed your drinks
Then George Soros taught me what to think
Garbage disposal in my new sink
Yesterday
I looked at cows in a different way
Like they were cute and gave us milk and whey
But methane gas smells is funk, okay?
We got twelve more years and that’s not a lot of time
We’ll be burning up, no one ordering from Amazon prime
Yesterday
The New Green Deal was on my resume
That Greta Thunberg best get out my way
I’ll cut a bitch, like fish filet
She’ll wish that she’d stayed in that Swedish place
I will steal her dreams and she’ll long for
Yes-ter-day-ay-ay-ay
Yesterday