America's Most Critical Journal since 1999
Death by Idiom (A two-character tragedy) By Martin H. Levinson Setting Two guys talking to each other anywhere in America JOE Can I be frank with you about Jack? JIM Certainly, but I want to be Jed. JOE Who’s Jed? JIM Somebody I made up. JOE Why would y... More »
by Boaz Dvir If you’ve never received a stimulus check, you should? Vote Republican. It’s the Democrats’ fault Vote Democrat. It’s the Republicans’ fault Ask your boss for a salary decrease so you can qualify. It may ultimately l... More »
edited by Lady Mollie Fermaglich In what some historians refer to as “one of the greatest love stories of the 20th century,” and others call, “a decision dumber than ordering the rack of lamb at Applebees, King Edward VIII of England gave up the throne w... More »
By Martin H. Levinson Dear Mister Etiquette: When I sit down to eat at a fancy affair, I get confused about what silverware to use and which glasses to drink from. Do you have any advice that can help me not make a fool of myself when I am at an event like thi... More »
Alright, you got me. 65 in a 40 — not great, I know. But when you’ve got “Hot for Teacher” cranked up on your way to the gym, how could you not stretch out the legs on this bad boy? Oh, you haven’t heard of it? Well, you might be too young, from the ... More »
September 30, 2020 Today is an excellent day! I have finally received the funding I require from the private sector to begin experimentation on my two Macaca mulatta (Rhesus macaque monkey) specimen. Both monkeys are of the same age, and same gender (male), of... More »
By Martin H. Levinson The patriotic Americans who stormed the Capitol on January 6th did so because Congress was about to ratify the results of a presidential election where millions of illegal immigrants mailed in votes from their vacation homes near the fiel... More »
by Dan Geddes Hollings’ Works Soldier’s Way (1920) Elmer and Louise (1922) A Green Sled and Other Poems (1923) Son of the South (1928) Share the Land (1931) Call of the Bottle (1937) Paris Nights (1943) (Screenplay) Shrapnel! (1945) One World—Part I ... More »
By Martin H. Levinson George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and FDR did some pretty amazing things when they led the country. But their achievements don’t hold a candle to America’s greatest president, Donald J. Trump, a one-term head of state who was robbed... More »
DRAFT COPY SECRETLY OBTAINED: Hard hitting letter by Humanities faculty at a major American university Since the eruption last summer of protests against police violence, American university campuses have been roiled by student unrest. The following draft let... More »
Dear Editor, Trump was robbed. If you subtract blacks, suburban women, and anyone with half a brain and just count racists, misogynists, and people who like making liberal heads explode Trump would have won in a landslide. If Trump loses this election it won... More »
By Eric Lichtblau A groundskeeper at President Trump’s Virginia golf course found a crumpled-up draft of a concession speech written in Trump’s own hand, complete with misspellings and edits. The draft reveals a president deeply conflicted over the... More »