Category

Poems

Funny and/or satirical poems from The Satirist’s archives.

86 posts

Andrew Yang
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I <3 NYC: A Campaign Poem By Andrew Yang

Published 4y ago -

By Will DiNola *With a perceived lack of support from the New York arts community, a viral bodega gaffe video, and an urge to be experimental in campaign communication methods, NYC Mayoral candidate Andrew Yang tries his hand at poetry in an attempt to win ov... More »

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The Road Not Taken, Millennial Style

Published 4y ago -

  By Martin H. Levinson     Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry not sorry I could not walk on both For fear of missing out, long I stood and looked down one as far as someone who is woke could To where it seemed kind of bent in the un... More »

Tucker Carlson
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Don’t Ban Tucker

Published 4y ago -

Don’t Ban Tucker  (To the tune of “Old Dan Tucker”) by K.D. Taylor “Tucker Carlson: From Twitter to CNN, the left is coming for your speech.” – Fox News “Tucker Carlson guest on Fox compares Twitter ban to Holocaust.” – The Independent Newsm... More »

typewriter
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Creative Writing – Induction Speech

Published 4y ago -

by Kevin Higgins It’s not all hanging around the college bar pretending to be Ted and Sylvia; or escaping to Italy with your lover, like the Barrett Brownings; or head-butting rivals in the green room during what you’ll later call your Norman Mailer phase;... More »

Trump distorted
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Trump is Bustin’ Out All Over

Published 4y ago -

By Martin H. Levinson With apologies to Rogers and Hammerstein (Sing to the tune of “June is Bustin’ Out All Over” from then musical Carousel) Joe Biden Trump’s goin’ out like a lion He’s whippin’ up the country sayin’ neigh Then the courts all... More »

(There’s No Going) Home for the Holidays

Published 4y ago -

  Oh, there’s no going Home for the Holidays, ‘Cause no matter how much you wash your hands, When you travel way over To your parents’ place, You are risking spreading covid to the fam.’ I met a man who lives in Tennessee, And he was staying a... More »

Trump distorted
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Trump-or-Treat

Published 4y ago -

by Raj Tawney Don’t let the ghoul fool you with his ruthless spoken trickery MAGA is his wizardry Feeding off our energy until the weak give in Food for his cauldron Slobber and spit, you’re a corn-on-the-cob in his grip If he measures your head it’s for... More »

man holding cellphone
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The Joke

Published 4y ago -

By Kevin Higgins after Walter Benjamin A barrel of industrial waste poured into a suit donated by a casino owner who knows people with a tangerine tea towel tossed strategically on top because it was the only available metaphor for hair was running for re-elec... More »

protests
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The Problem with History as I’ve Experienced It

Published 4y ago -

by Kevin Higgins     It interferes with the right of people like me to dine as we see fit. Whenever I visit England 1649, the sound of it taking just one swing of an inarticulate axe to abolish monarchy puts me off my coffee. After that, with every m... More »

Branson - Obama
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After Recent Unfortunate Results

Published 4y ago -

    Next election onwards, there’ll be a second vote for those who turn up with, under their arm, a print copy of one of the larger newspapers and answer a few unobtrusive questions to prove they’ve consumed it correctly. A third for those who al... More »

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The Charge of the Teacher Brigade

Published 4y ago -

  By Walter Bowne     I Down the hall, down the hall, Half a hall onward, All into the Classroom of Death Strode the six hundred. “Forward, the Teacher Brigade! “Charge those iPads!” he said. Into the Classroom of Death, Strode the six hun... More »

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