America's Most Critical Journal since 1999
CHEYENNE, WYOMING – Former Vice-Presidential candidate Sarah Palin shot former Vice President Dick Cheney in the face yesterday in what is being called a “tragic hunting accident.” Palin was visiting the former Vice President Cheney in order to c... More »
GENEVA – Despite an enjoyable summer in elite resorts, the world’s political and economic leaders are planning to resume screwing up the world again in early September. “The world community has had a nice six-week break from our destructive polic... More »
By Dan Geddes If the recent leaks about the NSA’s surveillance of all worldwide electronic communications have left you upset or confused, then you may be experiencing one of the five stages of NSA surveillance grief. Much like Kuebler-Ross’ Five ... More »
By Dan Geddes CAMBRIDGE, MASSACHUSETTS – Doctors at the prestigious Massachusetts Medical Research Labs (MMRL) have announced their discovery of a “stoner gene”—a genetic sequence that predisposes people to seek out the THC high that comes from smo... More »
WASHINGTON – The Obama Administration today restated its position that “Syria should never be admitted to the Eurovision Song Contest as long as President Assad remains in power.” President Hollande of France gave strong support to the US’s... More »
By Dan Geddes WASHINGTON – The Obama Administration announced today its new policy of quartering US troops and domestic security agents in private residences “for the safety of the people in these dangerous times.” Known as “Support the... More »
By Dan Geddes WASHINGTON – A new poll of 1,000 American adults reveals that both liberals and conservatives believe it is possible to “convert” other people to change their political orientation without the use of rational dialogue. The rec... More »
By Dan Geddes and Andrew Geddes Hector Shroff, a vice president at Sacks, Gold & Poen, has just been sentenced to one year house arrest for insider trading. Shroff will be forced to stay on the grounds of his estate in Mali for an entire year. Shroff, w... More »
By Dan Geddes 13 March 2013 WASHINGTON – The newly appointed US Drone Czar announced today that attack drones operating on US soil may not attack US banks without prior approval of the Federal Reserve Bank. “Let me be clear,” stated General Quent... More »
PALO ALTO – For many Apple consumers, the long delay between product releases from the Cupertino, California hardware giant is proving harmful to their emotional well-being. John Roswell, 28, of San Francisco lamented: “I haven’t been able to lord my... More »
By Dan Geddes MOSCOW – The Russian government today announced a new tax on certain high net wealth individuals, effectively immediately. In an unrelated story, French actor Gérard Depardieu, who only recently moved to Russia, has moved to Antarctica. Depard... More »
Computer Gamer Mourned on Facebook By Dan Geddes TOLEDO – Zed Rigby, 65, a life-long computer game enthusiast, died in his home in Toledo, Ohio last Monday. Mr. Rigby leaves behind no actual family or friends, but a number of his virtual friends are now ... More »